Monday, September 15, 2014

The Sermon

There's a song bird just outside my window this morning.

The sky is high and clear and the air outside looks crisp.

The clock is quickly approaching that hour where the blondes rise and stampede into their day.

I just rolled out of the bed and stammered here to greet you.

It's been too many days since I've sat and poured something out. I know no one is waiting around on my words...... but I have been. I need this space....this nook....this therapy. Pouring out here pours into me somehow.

I have a plethora of things to ponder and pass along.

Yesterday's message is a fine place to begin.

It was a memo of sorts....straight to my ailing, flailing heart.

I was so seared by the sermon shared - so deeply spoken to.

I'm still processing. Like picking up a handful of sand and sea shells - and shaking it out to let the sand fall between my fingers....the shells haven't completely emerged yet. I'm still handling it.

The text .....was 1 John 1:5-10. That bit of scripture that speaks of light and dark and sin and confession and fellowship.

Once the message is posted online, I'd like to post it here. I'm afraid my tidbits and nuggets just won't do.

Because when the Lord speaks mightily - it can be hard to properly regurgitate what actually transpires.

Sometimes it's just a deep, wordless thing.

I can't do it justice....but the main jest?....

 Fear is based in darkness. When we make decisions out of fear, in the dark - we make decisions based on things that are false - leading us to bad decision making. But when we make decisions in the light - we can see what's true - leading us to sound decision making. 

If you only knew, friends - how many of my decisions have been influenced by deep-seeded would know why this so resounds with my very shaky soul.

On another note....verse 9 of the text says to 'confess'. The guest preacher shared that the word confess does not mean to say 'I'm sorry'. It means to tell the truth. So really the scripture is asking us to tell God what we actually think and believe of Him....being honest, raw, real. It might look like the following:

God, I don't really believe you are loving.
God, I doubt scripture.
God, I don't actually believe you are always with me.
God, I often times don't even know if you are real.


All those things we believe in the dark....all those things that we believe all seeped and saturated in fear and warpedness....confess them. And then ask the Lord.....ask Him to turn the lights on!

Just like He did in the very beginning - His voice being the light switch and setting the sun ablaze and separating day from night - He'll illuminate your life. He still does that.

But ah, there's more. The Spirit spoke yesterday. If I can get my paws on a podcast - I'll certainly relay it to you.

This post here - has taken me most of the day. I have sat here between math and history, between lunch and snack, and now between nap and dinner. And such is the life of a wanna-be-writer homeschooling mom. :)

I have a pot of hot chicken soup on the stove - the scent of simmered poultry filling our sweet, small rent house.

The kids are out back playing in water and making a mess and traumatizing all sorts of insects on our porch.

But tonight...tonight I have a date. After the blondes reluctantly lay down heads and slip into slumber - I have plans of prayer and of confession and of asking.

Lord come and meet me where I am and let my life glow again.

Sunday, August 31, 2014


I went to a bookstore today.

This means I went right near heaven.

Few things make me feel inspired, and connected, and known, and enthused like pages in binding.

Passing all those classics I haven't read yet - I feel giddy and guilty all at the same time. It makes me want to scoop them all up for purchase and digestion.

A great mentor of ours once told us that we should seek out the books of old - not just the books of the hour. He told us that we should try to take in the writings that have stood the test of time...a bit more than we take in the ones that have only been spouted off recently.

He was quick to say that our more modern pieces certainly have the potential to speak and guide and minister - but that we should be very careful in our pursuing of them.

Our wise mentor isn't the only guy who has suggested this.

The following is from Alister McGrath's book entitled C.S. Lewis - A Life:

Lewis argues that a familiarity with the literature of the past provides readers with a standpoint which gives them critical distance from their own era. This allows them to see "the controversies of the moment in their proper perspective." The reading of old books enables us to avoid becoming passive captives of the Spirit of the Age by keeping "the clean sea breeze of the centuries blowing through our minds."


Don't get us all wrong here, please. There are some very sound words floating around these days, that come from people of our own generation. I'm shaken awake by many of them.

We just need to be careful. And prayerful. And picky.

Especially when it comes to the writings we expose our children to.

Gladys Hunt in her book entitled Honey for a Child's Heart (Fourth Edition) wrote this:

"Good books provide for the kind of character we hope to see developed in our children."


Teaching my own kids  - has awakened me to the fact that children are very heavily influenced, and spoken to, and captivated by.... books that teach them things in story form, rather than text book form.

Children are experts at pulling out moral nuggets and keen facts from simply listening to or reading good literature. It doesn't have to be dumbed down and spoon fed to them by way of a dry text.

And you, as the parent, will gain much from sitting in the pages with them.

I've grown, and been fed, and been whisked away by many of the readings I've done with my lassies.

I could go on and on, really.

 But alas - it's only half an hour until tomorrow.

And Mama here is tired and the pillow is calling.

It's been a pleasure sitting here with you over the last 7 days, friends. We should do this more often :)

Blessings and good books to you all.

Saturday, August 30, 2014


That C.S. Lewis quote from a few days ago....that one about the country - I can't shake it.

"If you are interested in the country only for the sake of painting it, you'll never learn to see the country.”

When my eyes first scanned those words - a lightbulb was lit.

Everything I see, everything I encounter, everything I feel - doesn't always have to be nettled down into verse. 

Sometimes when I come across something that strikes me - I get stressed.

I get stressed and frazzled because I suddenly feel the pressure to wrap that moment up in a fine tuned sentence to share.

I've heard a photographer say something similar....that when in precious moments, she feels the urge to capture it on camera instead of simply sitting in and enjoying the fleeting thrill. 

And now Lewis is pertaining the same thought to painting.

And I'm sure this is true of other art methods, too.

And this shouldn't be so, really.

Those of us who like to capture life in words, or on film, or on canvas - we will always feel the urge to regurgitate in some way - what we've happened upon.

And this is right, good, and God-given.

Artists capture.

So capture we should.

But when the pressure to pop out something brilliant - overrides our shear awe or shock or pleasure or despair of something.... maybe we should put the pen, the paint, the Polaroid down - and just be present.

Even for just a moment.

Maybe we should allow our hearts to really feel and see and revel in - before we nab it up and project it to others.

Maybe just giving ourselves permission to take things in for our own sakes - before we wrap it up and hook it in for others - is all that's needed.

I know it isn't always possible. I know that this idea can't stand for everything. Sometimes - we are called to capture. The end.

But most often - in gripping moments, in interesting experiences, in sweet holiday unwrappings, in gastly eye-opening situations, in breath-taking scenery, in drives through the country - taking a second to simply see it first for ourselves...

will result in more accurate, more heart-felt, more careful capturing for others.

As you go about your long weekend, friends - really see, really feel, really process - before you put it out or post it up. Stop the panic.

If the art is supposed to transpire, it will.

Especially if you breathe it in good before the making.

Friday, August 29, 2014


The cloud cover is thick and white and low this morning.

If I weren't in Texas - I'd think it was cold out.

The scene from my window makes it look as if there's a chill, but opening a door and taking one step into the backyard will prove otherwise...

...a blast of warmth will greet you.

And I love this. Heat, and sun, and sweat make me feel alive.

That's why...after I push publish here...I'm heading out for a quick workout.

This is allowable because today's schedule is a bit tinkered.

We won't be gathering round the table this morning for our lessons....we will be learning and exploring and discovering at the science museum instead.

A lovely luxury offered to homeschoolers is doing school and life and lessons elsewhere.

Dinosaurs, butterflies, animals, instruments - the possibilities for today are endless.

And an added treat? Daddy gets to do it all with us! A rare delight!

Mama here better hussle.

I have about a thousand things I plan to get done in the next hour. If I get half of them done..... I'll be happy :)

May your Friday be blessed and busting at the seems with joy, and grins, and revelations from the Lord. Hugs to you all.

Thursday, August 28, 2014


I'm sitting down to punch keys this morning a little later than I'd like to.

Because Mama here snoozed a bit longer than usual.

And that's okay.

I'm (slowly) learning to not beat myself up over the occasional slips.

They are to be expected.

Since I failed to stir myself in time to leak out my own words - I'll leave you with the words of others. Theirs have hit me strong lately, anyhow. Perhaps they'll do the same for you?

Be inspired. Carry these memes with you. And have a beautiful day.

“In our own case we accept excuses too easily; in other people’s we do not accept them easily enough.”- C.S Lewis

If you met a truly humble person, you wouldn't think him/her humble, but happy and incredibly interested in you. - Tim Keller

"Religious noise and worship do not necessarily mean the same thing." A.W. Tozer

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. -Mark Twain

'So often, a visit to a bookshop reminded me that there are good things in the world.' - Van Gogh

"If you are interested in the country only for the sake of painting it, you'll never learn to see the country.” ― C.S. Lewis

Let's really see today, friends. Hugs to you all.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014


I just wrapped up my reading of Hebrews.

And I'm sad to see it go.

I know that it's wispy pages are forever bound to my Bible - allowing me to revisit it's profoundness anytime - but I won't be sitting each morning and drinking from it's well like I have been.

From the moment I started in on that book - I felt utterly sucked in and smitten and quenched.

Scholars don't know who penned it..... Paul, Apollos, Barnabas, even Priscilla...have been suggested, but no common consensus has been made.

We may not know who exactly wove the words of this book - but we know that they were skillfully wise in their weaving - and that the Holy Spirit was present when the words were crafted.

Yes, crafted. Hebrews is truth art.
It's a feast.
It's savory.

After one morning reading - I jotted down that I wanted to "pick up a spoon and scoop up the scriptures off the page". 

It was that satisfying.

Before this - I had hit a bit of a dry spell in my studying and taking in of the word. For numerous reasons - I hadn't the wherewithal or drive to consume it.

But then I felt lead to head to Hebrews.

And I was fed to the filling.

If you feel the urge to head there yourself -  go into it understanding that it tastes best in small morsels. Resist the itch to plow through. Really chew on it. And persist to the end.

One of the many nuggets that struck me most was this:

But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who have faith and preserve their souls. - Hebrews 10:39

Odd that the day before I read this, a guest preacher stood on the stage of our church and beamed to us all that self-preservation is what will make you lose your life....that making all of your decisions out of fear and preserval of self will only lead you to making bad decision.

And when he spoke this out - it reverberated loud in me.

And it ran so much against my thread.

I have spent my whole life desperately trying to preserve myself (my health, my energy, my safety) - and here swoops in this preacher and this scripture telling me to not shrink back and preserve myself, but to step forward and instead concentrate on preserving my soul.


Ah, the sun is peeping once more, friends.

There is much to plate up and pass around when it comes to Hebrews - but I suppose you'll have to go do some munching yourself. Mama here better get moving - or else!

May the Lord speak to you tenderly and intimately through whatever scripture, song, or sermon you find yourself in today.

Lord, meet and feed each one.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014


Today will be full.

Piano lessons.
Soccer practice.
Dance class.

I don't usually do well with a plate over piled - but I don't thrive with an empty one, either. So, bring on the runaround.

I'm sitting smack in the calm before the precious storm. It's dim. The sprinklers are on outside. Everyone is still lost in a dream-like state. Shadows flicker on the wall as my lone candle flares. And Mama is wanting to do today.... well. Really well.

I want to smile more than I scowl.
I want to play more than I pout.
I want a soft heart, rather than a harried one.
I want love to shine like a beacon and bounce off these walls and sear their souls.
I want to live in such a way today - that my children desire to join me.

J.C. Ryle - back in 1888 - said this:

"Love should be the silver thread that runs through all your conduct. Kindness, gentleness, long-suffering, forbearance, patience, sympathy, a willingness to enter into childish troubles, a readiness to enter into childish joys, these are the chords by which a child may be led most easily, - these are the clues you must follow if you would find the way to his heart." - from The Upper Room, quoted in Educating the Wholehearted Child by Clay Clarkson.

Just, yes.

I can't even expound.

Oh God - let those things, let those fruits....ring and reign loud and lavishly in this home.

The sheen of light coming from the window, is telling me that day is about to break wide open.

I can sense.... that the blondes will be out of the gate shortly.

Things are the home, and in my soul.

Lord fill me and let it overflow.